"AmberHunk"...my fave character
Judy takes the lead 
My projected date of departureEvery situation has some delightful aspects. Even having cancer?
Now that I may be Terminal (aren't we all but don't count me out yet) I have been transformed from Judy, Woman without the Vote into Judy, Dominatrix Supremo. The slightest quiver of my lip or moist twitch of an eyelash causes those around me to scurry about in clouds of succor and concern. I think this is what my dear daughter calls "workin' it". Janet is now a virtuoso in this Interpersonal Style being a Katrina Victim. Perhaps she will soon have Gustav hanging from her belt?
I hear you say, "Judy, how have you exerted your newly gained Powers"?
Paul Edmund, husband dear, is a man of cautious and considered habit. Jeff has been browbeating him for months or years to correct his formidable sleep apnea. The Doctor's admonitions have fallen on more than just Paul's deaf ears.
These days....I just mutter "it would be nice" and Paul Edmund is sleeping like a babe in the cradle albeit with a snakelike, snorting contraption encircling his noggin'. He looks and sounds a bit like a drooling Darth Vader. The aesthetics alone are worth the price of entry. Better still! Paul was awake yesterday during daytime hours and the life of the party. Normally he drifts in and out of consciousness 24/7.
Jeff provided me a fillip on "workin' it". He claims that every Southern Lady has a right to the Vapors and that I have not heretofore embraced my birthright. Now is the time. The Scene: Paul/Jeff/a Guest are babbling when I suddenly get a hankering for my latest trash novel, Lost in Amber by D. Gabaldon or something like that. Trust me, neither the title nor the text interferes in the flow of Diana G's florid and torrid imagination. Next a cloud of Vapors descend upon me and I needs retire. To my fantasy frolics! In some ways life has never been so good.
I have decided that my cancer will prove to be entirely treatable. Now that the pressure is off I have been turning my imagination and artistic talents to the task of tombstones. You will see attached my latest thoughts on the matter plus estimated time of departure.
Hope you are all enjoying the Holiday Weekend. Think of me as I dawdle and dabble happily here by the ever so hot and soggy lake. Nesting on my Verandah Shangri-La I increasingly feel like some character created by Faulkner or Capote seen through Thurber's impish eye. I only sigh and long for one of Gabaldon's Hunks in Amber to trot up and give me a good massage...
Judy of the Vampish Vapors (via Jeff)
2 comments:
a word from Mother's San Francisco friend, Richard Brydon.
I have encouraged you to sell alligator meat from a "recycled" ice cream truck. I ALSO THOUGHT ABOUT THE COMMERCIAL EXPLOITATION OF THE NUTRIA RAT. LOUISIANA COULD BE THE "MEAT BASKET" OF THE WORLD! Now that you are spending a bit of time in Arkansas perhaps a foray into fried tics would add to your culinary exploits?
Memories related to the fabulous Miz Flounce:
1982: JJ and I are looking for parking near Cost Plus in SF and JJ
pronounces the lot to be "Chockablock" full. I go nuts and use the word excessively for 2 years. Was this a gift from Judy or just a general word about town?? Is that a word Miz Flounce used or just "unreal"?
1983, Judy is visiting Casa Grove, and extols the virtues of Kava. Richard and JJ experience frenzied mirth. Why?
A. We're wise guys.
B. The word sounds funny.
C. The positive qualities ascribed to Kava by Judy are as extravagent as those made by snake oil purveyors.
2008: Richard and Jeffrey extol the virtues of Kava. Maturity prevails.
My point being that kids in their 20's don't always appreciate the kind, loving, sane, steady people around them, who have supported and shaped them. As I have matured (far more gradually than average), I have developed a strong appreciation of and love for the one snd only "Judy Jones" of this world. Perhaps that's why your health challenges are so poignent for me.
Thank you so very much, Judy!
I know your kind! AmberHunk is really not anyone in a novel. I googled his name. No such fictional character.
Is he your piece on the side? You Southern Ladies are quite the Inspiration!!! Does he travel?
Post a Comment