My mother became ill in August 2008 with ovarian cancer. This is a story of the final months of an exceptional woman.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Further update from Jeff

Mother and I had a wonderful conversation this morning on her veranda Shangri-La. Clear as a bell. MizFlounce was clocked in...albeit not at full force. Given I was talking with her about her situation and its significance that might take the jollity out of any tête-à-tête.

Why the dramatic improvement? It is not possible to say for certain. Sometimes folks going into a final decline have periods of increased energy, orientation and general lucidity apropos of nothing. I think Mother's may be due to the fact I suspect she has not been taking her thyroid medications for some time. That can cause anyone to be considerably slowed down, physically and mentally, even when in the pink of health. I restarted her on her thyroid med about 4 days ago plus two other medications that improve energy and mental acuity at the same time. Could these changes be producing positive results?


The more Christian or, at the very least, spiritual among you may be delighted to know that Mother has been chatting with a kind and intelligent chaplain for the past 45 minutes, Susan Miller. I arranged for her to come over today. And following this visit ... as much as Mother wants.

Mother was raised Methodist and is very comfortable with the Christianity with a very small "c". She is just put out by folks who have the "do-not-doubt" approach to their beliefs no matter what their religious background. Chaplain Miller definitely does not seem doctrinaire or proselytizing so I think it may be a good match.

Mother's friend, Tina has had some lovely white daisy's and pink roses sent in a glowing ruby glass vase just delivered. Elegant and lovely! I will sign off and trot them out to Mother. The timing could not be better. She will see and enjoy them completely. Thanks to you Tina and to everyone. Let us hope this improvement holds....and continues.

The day is lovely after many days of torrential downpours. I cut and collected a few of Mother's beloved peonies to put on her desk.


Jeff

a friend of mother and myself in San Francisco, Sally Pincus, sent her this card. Very clever and sweet it is. The imagery has some significance...Mother is so enjoying her garden, the Monarch Butterflies are self-explanatory given her blog entry for a few days ago and my friends call my "hedgehog" sometimes due to my very thick upright brown hair.
http://www.jacquielawson.com/viewcard.asp?code=1859814908006&source=jl999

PS I have no idea what this change might mean in relation to her chemotherapy? Perhaps it might be re-initiated? Nonetheless, the prognosis is still not even close to what one might call "good"...

PPS: One or two fun-filled quotes from mother this morning for you.
1. "How do I feel about my declining health? Weird. One day you are old and worn out. That's strange enough. Then your body starts drawing back for the knock out blow. It's so weird. It's me."
2. I read to Mom an email from her old friend, Ann Dunker who had many loving and kind things to say about Mother. "Ann is one of the world's really good people. What she said means so much to me." then a pause and MizFlounce looks up with a twinkle in her eye..."but where's the money? Times are tough. Call Ann and tell her I'll consider it a late payment for Easter" another pause..."I think Ann needs a bit of a good time on the side. Some good looking man" another pause..."but then she is not that kind of person" another pause adding "she is very sensible with money and would never spend it on anything like that you know."
3. Kelsey Hall sent a card arriving today detailing the excitement of a huge bird in her pool appearing along with 11 "birdlings" ... all of whom disappeared in a cloud of sparkles before she could scamper out to more fully appreciate them. Mother ... "How e -g -g -g - c - i - t- i - n - g...." (Mother is beginning to have droopy lids now). "Be certain to tell Kelsey I have four BIG birds and 11 tiny ones that sashay through here every day." (two families of geese have shown up; one pair have five goslings and the other has six). "Shur hope Pod doesn't show up and blow them to smithereens with his shotgun"

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

A Word or Two

Dear Everyone,

I just came back with Mother from her appointment with Dr. Muldoon at the Genesis Center.

She has been eating and drinking very little over the past 2 weeks or so and is increasingly confused and lethargic. Even at her best she has virtually no memory and can track only the most concrete of conversations. She did not follow my conversation with the doctor. Perhaps for the best. I think she mostly forgets she has cancer and says things like "I hope I am not coming down with something!"

Mother will not be receiving any further chemotherapy. I will be meeting with a hospice nurse in about 30 minutes to set all of that up for improved in-home care..

Mother actually is her usual graceful and kindly self. For the most part she seems in good spirits (when I am assiduous in keeping the pain under control). Dad is very, very upset but is great with her and a solid trooper in handling all of this. She said on the way to the doctors..."that Paul Edmund...he's become a total angel. And he never stops doing, doing, doing. I wonder what has gotten in to him..."

Who knows how long she will last. It seems to me that the cancer is now progressing very, very swiftly. I hope she will have have as peaceful a time of it, that which remains, as she has presently.

I know all of you care for her and she truly appreciates that. As do Dad, Janet and myself.

A bientot!

Jeff for Mom

About Me

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Vacherie, Louisiana, United States
Born in rural Arkansas my tongue took up residence in my cheek shortly thereafter. I use it to speak "Genteel Southern Lady". Cussin' I only use when provoked by the Uppity. Paul, my husband, and I have lived in Cajun Country for many years raising cane, twins (a boy and a girl; now adults? definitely old) and other mischief. Alligators, water moccassins and bears have tussled with me as I protect our swampy coastal farmstead. We are stuck now on lovely Lake Hamilton near Hot Springs where we have our second home. We have been here waiting for Godot since my heart valves blew out Late November 2007 and now with cancer diagnosed August 2008. The Furies have me in their sights... I am writing this blog to let my Beloveds know how I am doing so they will not "get off" in imagined ways on my dire straits. The reality is bad enough without turning my story into a B-grade movie of the mind. I know all of you wish me the very best. And I miss you! never no mind your fevered imaginations. This is as close as I can get to a fond and loving chat with you right now... Sadly, Judy aka Mizflounce passed away peacefully early on Sunday morning May 30th 2009 age 78.